When You're in a Bad Relationship Self Help Techniques Might Not Work

If you are in a bad relationship self help techniques might not work unless you look for the right type of advice. In any bookstore you will find shelves of books written about appropriate courses of action to take when dealing with a failing relationship. These books cover issues concerning bad relationships entirely and recommend solutions to your situation. You'll also notice that many of the authors do have very impressive credentials.

How can you possibly know that their recommendations will work? Are these same writers themselves happily involved with someone? Quite honestly, my opinion is this; someone who suggests a solution should be involved in a great relationship, yet a relationship that has overcome issues before they can qualify to help other folks with their problems. To put it in other words, a person who has been there and done that. After all you don't go to a monk for sex help do you? So why ask a single person how to make a love relationship work?

For those who truly need failing relationship advice, they should consider using a self-help book such as "The Magic Of Making Up". It's a book written by a real person who is now happily married and he writes to help folks who have standard relationship problems. Wouldn't you want someone who cares whether or not if you and your partner make it? A person who will answer your emails should you want to ask them a question. Lets do a reality check here… books can't address every unique situation.

Usually a relationship can be improved as long as both parties are willing. A perfect marriage is very difficult to obtain if not impossible but do you really need it to be perfect? No human being is perfect so how can we expect a perfect relationship? In this instance I'd say close counts. With good communication and a little consideration for the things that aren't perfect you can have a great relationship with your existing partner. They may very well be your right match but you’ve just hit a hurdle or two and you need some help getting over the obstacle.

What's more, self help marriage counseling can be an answer for those of us who don't feel comfortable sitting down with a stranger to discuss the intimate details of our relationship. Unless you know where to start and what to look for in all likelihood you aren't going to achieve much more than another controversy. When you are involved with a relationship issue, it is necessary to take a look at the matter from the other person's perspective. Taking a different perspective will sometimes reveal an obvious solution.

In an unhappy relationship it's important to deal with the painful issues. Sweeping them under the rug will not resolve them. Discussing these issues will take patience and commitment. For example, sex may be causing an issue between you and your partner but it is difficult to discuss making love. Both of you may feel embarrassed or ashamed or annoyed that this subject is coming up again.

So before you go headlong into sorting out your relationship, make sure you have done some reading and meander carefully while you apply what you have learned. Take it slowly and don't let your discussions turn into a quarrel. If matters start to get out of hand, walk away and cool down. You cannot make your mate speak to you, so if they aren't willing to chat at the present time then leave it be. Wait a couple of days. You might find that your partner is as eager as you are to sort out the issues. Pick the right moment before applying the relationship self help approach.